Fortunately, its from the Onion — but it sounds way too real!
A panel of top business leaders testified before Congress about the worsening
recession Monday, demanding the government provide Americans with a new
irresponsible and largely illusory economic bubble in which to invest.
"What America needs right now is not more talk and long-term strategy, but a
concrete way to create more imaginary wealth in the very immediate future," said
Thomas Jenkins, CFO of the Boston-area Jenkins Financial Group, a bubble-based
investment firm. "We are in a crisis, and that crisis demands an unviable
The current economic woes, brought on by the collapse of the so-called
"housing bubble," are considered the worst to hit investors since the equally
untenable dot-com bubble burst in 2001. According to investment experts, now
that the option of making millions of dollars in a short time with imaginary
profits from bad real-estate deals has disappeared, the need for another
spontaneous make-believe source of wealth has never been more urgent.
If it wasn’t so sad, it would be hysterical . . .
Recession-Plagued Nation Demands New Bubble To Invest In
July 14, 2008 | Issue 44•29