Imagine you just fucked up really badly. Maybe it was a PIPE deal you front ran (aka insider trading); Perhaps you dipped into some of those managed accounts to maintain your lifestyle. Could be you helped your dad or uncle with a massive ponzi scheme.
What do you do after your lawyer says “This is bad — really bad.” Then starts talking about bringing in white collar defense lawyer to make sure you get out in a few years.
That’s right, you are heading to the graybar hotel. Who do you call?
Believe or not, there is a firm that specializes in these situations: Wall Street Prison Consultants:
Welcome to Wall Street Prison Consultants. My name is Larry Levine, and I’d like to take this opportunity to introduce Fedtime 101, a revolutionary new program tailored specifically for white collar offenders entering the Federal Prison System.
Fedtime 101, is a unique “SURVIVAL PROGRAM” on Federal Prison life, that I designed and put together while serving time behind prison walls. Fedtime 101 provides, direct one-on-one counseling and guidance, to ensure you have a complete understanding of the issues lying ahead of you and your family.
Furthermore, my assistance continues after you’re incarcerated, to address and/ or rectify any concerns you family may have. My commitment is to provide the most accurate, up-to-date information, addressing all key issues concerning BOP Policy, pre- and post-custody policy, and what really happens when goes inside.
This must have been what Alan Greenspan was referring to when he praised financial Innovation . . .
Wall Street Prison Consultants