1. You can’t make it alone. No one is complete, everyone needs help and guidance.
2. Be the best you you can be, that’s your only hope, don’t try to be someone else, it’s your uniqueness that’s your calling card. Your goal is to be yourself and then to glom on to someone who can complement your greatness and beam you into the stratosphere…assuming that’s where you want to go, that’s not the only goal, happiness is key, sometimes a little is enough.
3. Don’t sand off your rough edges, learn how to get along, but don’t aspire to be a namby-pamby wuss without opinions. We gravitate to those with edges, who express what we feel but cannot say.
4. Getting it right is worth a lot. Most people don’t try that hard. Others try to do it just like everybody else. Your goal is to fulfill your vision and get it right for yourself. When you do, others will resonate.
5. Introverts need extroverts, opposites attract, look for someone to fill the holes you cannot. (This is an analogue of #1, but it bears repeating in a society where everybody’s trying to be someone they are not.)
6. Leave the house. Even if you’re not sure you want to go. Online is a facsimile of life. You can only truly be alive when you interact with other people. You never know what will happen, assuming you are playing.
7. Everybody hates failure and loss. The key is to put yourself in uncomfortable situations. Once you do this you’ll find out the good results outweigh the bad, and then you will be empowered to take new risks.
8. Everybody is lonely too. If you’re honest and forthright you might be able to make a connection. Be vulnerable, people are attracted to that.
9. For every person who doesn’t remember meeting you, who doesn’t say hi, there are many who remember every word you said and are eager to interact with you again.
10. Those who talk longest are unaware they’re wasting your time. Learn how to extract yourself gracefully from these one-sided conversations.
11. If something is great, no length is too long. If something is bad, any length is too long.
12. Be in the mix. (This is an analogue of #6. Not only do you need to go, you need to interact. If you’re waiting for people to engage with you you’re missing out.)
13. You have unknown fans. Stay the course, they’ll ultimately surface and support you.
14. Some people refuse to deliver bad news, so they have others do it for them. Be sure to know where the bad news is coming from.
15. Just because someone’s cute and a good conversationalist, that does not mean they’ll be a good mate. You’re looking for someone with perseverance, who will also call you on your b.s. One of the greatest predictors of commitment is credit rating. (“Credit Scores and Committed Relationships”: 1.usa.gov/1PC9Ken)
16. Some people need to put you down to feel good about themselves. Ignore them.
17. Some people are full of pipe dreams, they tell a good story but nothing ever comes to fruition. Ignore them.
18. Deciding who to follow is one of the big games/choices of life. The people you associate with will determine your future.
19. Many famous people you hate you will like when you finally meet them, but not all. Don’t equate image with reality.
20. One day you’ll wake up and realize those people you saw every day…you never see them anymore.
21. Life is about exhilaration. We’re in constant search of it and we adhere and attach to those who provide it. We don’t want you to play to us, we want you to follow your own muse and shine so brightly that we can bask in your beacon.