Those MF Global MFs!

We have a good friend with money tied up in the MF Global debacle.

As of November 1^st, he had close to $100K in his “segregated”  futures account with no open positions (BR: Not FU money, but real cash nonetheless).  He says the MF Global website is shut down and the phones don’t ring when he calls.   This guy was a “big swinging Richard” at one of Wall Street’s biggest firms and now trades his own account.

Here is his letter of rebuke to MF Global, which he passed on to us.  Can you tell he is a little peeved?

Dear MFGI Correspondence Team:

Since you have been taciturn and uncommunicative – I thought I might lighten the mood, break the ice so to speak.

You do realize that the theft of customer funds is a first. So congratulations, even in the dark days of Hank Paulson and his ummm-how to put this delicately, “… you are all screwed anyway…” policy – none of the Oligarchs had descended to just outright theft. Even Madoff had the class to run a proper Ponzi scheme requiring charisma, finesse and time.

Outright crude theft – well that is indeed a new phase in our culture. It is a progress from infidelity to gang-bang – from the Sublime to the SubSlime. And So, we are now in uncharted waters.

Just for fun, I like to speculate on what the Oligarchs think will happen once they get all the loot and leave the smoldering remains of a once great country – I wonder if they think we are still in a Rudyard Kipling world where the bare-assed natives in Asia and Africa will welcome them as Gods. I bet not many have actually tried to set up a bank account overseas – they will find that no one wants American clients! They will also find that the pittance they looted won’t go too far – maybe a studio apartment on the outskirts of town, a couple of beers and some local hookers – your money is no good here etc etc.  Most of all they will be aliens – have to line up to get temporary visitor visas etc

And until they are able to give up their US citizenship – which would be unwise until some other country grants them citizenship on a refugee or other basis – they will have to file US tax returns and report their earnings from all their world wide sources.

In short – if the Oligarchs think they are going to flee to a life of opulence , they will be bitterly disappointed. But they will unfortunately probably have to flee in any event – take your malaria pills along.