At Lehman’s annual meeting held in April of this year, Richard Fuld, CEO of Lehman Brothers, was rumored to have said: "I will hurt the shorts, and that is my goal."
That quote was widely circulated — but it turns out to be wrong. You see, Fuld never actually uttered that phrase. The speech he gave was incorrectly transcribed.
What Fuld actually said was "____________."
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You can fill in the blank below
great, now the theme to that 70s game show “Match Game” is in my head – cue the wacky bassline and wah guitar…
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Match_Game
I will fill my shorts before this is all over!
“I will eat my shorts; that is my goal.”
I am getting a kickback from the shorts. Don’t tell.
“Be vewy quiet; I’m hunting wabbits”
“I will eat my shorts if he makes that goal.”
I have browned my shorts!
“I will take it in the shorts – that is my goal.”
“These shorts hurt, and I’m going to jail.”
Ah, yes. That speech, that line. It was a kind of ditty, I recall (Fuld might have had one too many) something like…
I heard the great Schwartz, and He told me my role:
‘Avoid M. Whitney of Oppy, and Einhorn the Bold.’
“I am so hurtin’ to get into Erin Callan’s shorts”
“these shorts are making me thirsty”
“My goal is to be walking in my shorts on the Copacabana while the rest of you starve to death. Suckers.”
Erin is a man….
When Fuld said, “I will hurt the shorts, and that is my goal”, did he actually say —
A.) I have a shirt and shorts — and a hat is my goal
B.) I’ll skirt the courts, and that is my goal
C.) I’m pert in my shorts, and fat like a foal
D.) Eye Bill curse the ports, and cats have my Skoal [Ancient Pirate Curse].
may the shorts be with me, or against me, whatever….
I have wet my shorts, and I love my goat.
Well, since he’s a super smart Investment Banker, he must have said
“I will HELP the shorts, and that is my goal”
Another Success!
1) I’ll short Hertz & escape the gaol!
(BTW, gaol = jail in Britain)
2) I heard the shots from the grassy knoll!
“May the Schwartz be with you”
I know he didn’t but what he should have said was:
“We are SO screwed!”
My nose hurts when I snort, so fire up a bowl.
“I’m a little teapot, short and stout. Don’t fuck with me.”
Obviously, an honest mistake with the transcription.
“I’m going to short and that is my goal.”
I’m already short, zero is my goal.
I have a short Dick..(fuld) in my shorts.
I will “screw” the shorts
“After we report 2nd Qtr. results, the longs will feel like they have been kicked in the shorts.”
“I’m a short tool, and that’s my goal!”
Can’t be sure, could have been stool. Pretty sure tool..ie…DICK.
A few days ago, Denninger paraphrased Dick Fuld’s declaration using the colorful language we expect from the sage of Niceville. It referenced a use of the cranium, specifically, skulls that was not intended by nature.
” Wish I could get those stearn bear hunters out of my shorts”
I will hurt the shorts, and that is my goal. Erin, text Gasperino back. Tell that fucker we’ll pay his price
“Yeah that’s right Steinberg, I had sex with your wife — deal with it shorty”
Gasparino would crap his shorts, on air, if I told him what I really thought our books were worth.
Some good contenders submitted so far…
goat?????
What Fuld really said was:
I have a few billion stashed in my shorts. Get the rest Erin!
In the business we call that an inadequate hedge.
Dude, it looks to me like Erin Callan’s shorts are what screwed LEH over.
Fuld will survive. It’s only Lehman.
“They will hurt me in court when the truth is told.”
“I am Elmer J. Fuld, millionaire. I own a mansion and a yacht”
I just Rorschached in my shorts!
mama take these shorts from me,
I can’t sue them anymore..
“Is that a Dick Fuld in your shorts, you gentile?”
I will herd some goats and that is my pail.
It was pure nonsense, but most of the analysts agree it was the most important statement he made. It was made in response to a question about what he will be doing in his yet un-named non-extradition South American country next year.
“How do we skirt the courts and get on the dole?”
(Fed bailout, avoid BK)
A lesson’s been taught, now where’s my begging bowl?
I’m eating (your) shorts!
What Fuld actually said was “I have soiled my shorts and will soon be on the dole.”
I think I read the quote somewhere was: “I will skull-fuck the shorts, and that’s my goal”
These shorts hurt my pole….?
You are so right! I was at that meeting, feeling a little festive, mind you – but I recall some loathsome investor piped up about alternative energy and Fuld fumed:
“I will burn my children, that is my coal”.
(is Fuld that bald guy with a red mustache?)
this trade is starting to feel crowded. I’m covering…..
What he really said was “I will consult with Patrick Byrne; I’ve always liked the way he’s dealt with these things over at Overstock”
Where’s Ben’s phone number, I think we need to talk.
i’m wearing shorts, she’s wearing skirts. we both are going down!!!
“Blue Horse Shoe loves Anacot Steel”.
Aisle hut tea shots under my gold
Fuld said nothing, he just told Gasparino to come up with something inspiring.
“From where I’m sitting, our balance sheet takes the whole ‘hurting the shorts’ issue off the table.”